| 4 Sep 2003 @ 20:31, by Letecia Layson|
From September 2003 Magical Blend
For two decades, self-help books have hammered home a consistent theme for successful romantic relationships: first, you must love yourself. A new study, headed by a psychologist at the University of Georgia, may turn that wisdom on its head, though.
It turns out that those with positive self-views bordering on narcissism are usually miserable mates--selfish, manipulative, unfaithful, and power hungry. The study, co-authored by Keith Campbell, assistant professor of psychology at UGA, Craig Foster of the U.S. Air Force Academy, and Eli Finkel of Carnegie-Mellon University, was published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology.
Clinical narcissism itself is a personality disorder affecting only about one percent of the population, but there are millions who share characteristics of narcissists to a greater or lesser degree. In general, true narcissists think very highly of themselves, are not very concerned with intimacy, and believe they are unique and smarter and more attractive than others. They often maintain these feelings by seeking and expressing superiority to or dominance over others.
Despite anecdotal evidence to the contrary, men are only slightly more likely than women to fall into this category. Narcissists often find it easy to get dating partners but rarely have long-term relationships. People with low opinions of themselves may be especially easy prey for narcissists.
Viewing excessive narcissism as a problem is nothing new, of course. In Greek myth, Narcissus saw himself as beautiful and better than those around him, but his love of himself kept him from falling in love with anyone else. In the end, he fell in love with his own reflection in a pool of water and died.
If you want to read more on narcissism check out Sam Vaknin, Ph.D's website. It has lots of information and links...good reading.